The reality haunts, things don’t seem the way they should, they are not the way you want them to, and they are not even the way you thought about. If these are the kind of thoughts that wander deep down or probably on the surface of your mind, then, welcome to Life! It doesn’t go about in a uniform motion, it accelerates, it decelerates, and it may seem that it has come to a rest, or is approaching to rest, but it just moves on in a continuous non-predictable manner. Keep making plans, but what happens to you when you are busy making plans is called life.
The fundamental similarity amongst each one of us is, we are resistive to change and change is the only constant. The degree of resistivity just varies upon the cognitive psychology of each being; it just depends on the past years of their lives. Some can let go off what they are holding onto, while others just keep holding to it so tightly, that it makes their own life claustrophobic. Holding onto things and not adapting to change is as dangerous as holding a burning coal, the longer you hold the more harmful it gets.
But, how I really wish that adapting to undesirable changes was as easy as it is said. Each one of us has something that they cannot let go off, they cannot just accept and move on with it. For instance, loss of the loved one brings in innumerable changes more than one can account for. A person undergoing such a rapid change is not able to accept and move with it, they know nothing can make things the way they were, it is a situation out of control, yet the heart still weeps and hopes that the emptiness in their heart and the love or acceptance they are seeking for will be filled, which builds a viscous circle of expectations from life, and the resistance to a new life ahead.
The human mind can be very well related to physics, a ball which is at rest will continue to stay at rest, until acted by an external force. Similarly we have inertia of thoughts too; we continue to think and believe in the same lines unless acted upon by an external trigger, the more the gravity of thoughts the more resistive it is to change. One thing that can stop you from harming your inner peace is inner strength, the ideology of letting go, of not letting situations take toll over you. Not letting the external environment change you internally. Many of us, let the situations or the changes we encounter overpower our personality, change the being that we originally are, sometimes also kill the zeal for life, give up on desires or yet alone give up on life itself.
Yes, it is difficult that how can you adapt to the changes and yet go unaltered with the way you are, but it is not impossible. Tying oneself to short term goals and achieving them for oneself and not for anyone else, gives pleasure beyond words. Spend time doing things that shift your focus off your problems. Rhonda Byrne in her documentary The Secret, talks about the secret shifters that divert your attention to more positive attributes of life. Each one has a part in us, the real self, where we do things we actually like. It can be anything, from socializing with people to attaining solitude, reading books to writing prose or poetry, listening to music to composing music, watching your favorite movie to role playing as some character. These secret shifters work like positive escape routes. They help you adhere to changes smoothly and retain your inner peace no matter how turbulent the external environment is.
Don’t give others the power to affect your soul the way you cannot even imagine, take charge and embrace the change with a smile & you will see how things fall in place.